kinda what i asked for and more.

kinda what i asked for and more.





sometimes i think i'm just really going throught the motion of doing something only because i know i have to do it. it's getting boring, and it's geting painful.
since i last blogged and proclaimed that life has been pretty stable for me, things have taken a turn for the...well...i wouldn't say worse. neither will i say better.






things have just ..changed.
not everything of course. some things still make me feel like i'm on the top of the world..things like my chinese grades ( i shall elaborate later)...my very own personal dum-dum chef...my new bra...my somewhat-new superman pencil case...my vintage-looking black, copper and grey hair clip with embedded jewels (which my literature teacher calls fierce)...my new clothes...my soon-to-be-new valentino-lookalike chiffon graduation gown...and my jason mraz CD.





putting it this way, there seems to be alot to be happy about. yet for every good, there is an offsetting bad.





a few nights ago, i was listening to the song Tears in heaven by Eric Clapton and it was on repeat on my CD player..and for some reason, i started crying.
i don't know exactly what i was crying about or why i was crying at such a time....but i did. and it suddenly seemed that there was so much to cry about and for every tear that i cried, i cried for a different reason. it's stupid i know and it's been a long time since i've cried like that. i think i've somehow exhausted my supply of tears.




but i don't feel like talking about it now.
let's talk about my chinese olevel results.



i am pleased to announce that i hapily secured a praise-worthy grade of D7 and i'm over the moon. ok..i know how crazy i sound at the moment. i'm like jumping up and down with my results slip and everyone is like "eh how much you got??"
then i'll be..oh, D7. and after that, they'll just go.."huh D7 you still so happy..crazy..."






well..before i go any further trying to explain why a D7 to me is like an A1 to a....erm...a....


ok ok rephrase.
a D7 to me is like an A1 to gin. sounds better?? yeah i know it does.


right..as i was saying, the reason why i'm so over the moon, cows, mars, aliens, jupiter, pluto and what have you... is because i've never gotten anything more than an F9 in my chinese. never. i'm not kiding. never ever. so this time getting a D7 is..well you should understand.
denise and i kinda planned together that we would get a F9 together and start taking chineseB. then outta sudden she turned to me and said...actually, it wouldn't be impossible for you to get an E8.
i burst out laughing and look what i got. a pretty little "Chinese-D7" sitting snugly on my olevel certificate. i like....
so..i do not plan to retake it, or get transfered to chineseB.





anyway, to sum up the whole of this weird not-here not-there blog entry,
jason mraz says "It takes no time to fall in love.But it takes you years to know what love is"
and it's my favourite line.
"Do you ever wonder what happens to the words that we send.Do they bend, do they break from the flight that they take.And come back together again with a whole new meaning.In a brand new sense, completely unrelated to the one I sent"
and this is another of my favourite lines from my dearly beloved jason mraz.



*****************************************
plane-jason mraz

drain the veins in my head
clean out the reds in my eyes to get by security lines
dear x-ray machine,
pretend you don't know me so well
i wont tell if you lied
cry, cause the droughts been brought up
drinkin' cause you're lookin so good in your starbucks cup
i complain for the company that I keep
the windows for sleeping rearrange
and I'm nobody well who's laughin
nowi'm leaving your town again
and I'm over the ground that you've been spinning
and I'm up in the air so baby hell yeah
well I can see your house from here
if the plane goes down, damn
i'll remember where the love was found
if the plane goes down, damn
damn, I should be so lucky
even only 24 hours under your touch
you know I need you so much
i cannot wait to call you
and tell you that I landed somewhere
and hand you a square of the airport
and walk you through the maze of the map that im gazing at
gracefully unnamed and feeling guilty for the luck
and the look that you gave me
you make me somebodyain't nobody knows me
not even me can see it, yet I bet I'm
i'm leaving your town again love
but I'm over the quilt that you've spinning
and I'm up in the air, so baby hell yeah
oh honey I can see your house from here
if the plane goes down, damn
i'll remember where the love was found
if the plane goes down, damn
you keep me high minded
you get me highflax seeds, well they tear me open
and supposedly you can crawl right through me
taste these teeth please
and undress me from these sweaters better hurry
cause I'm keeping upward bound now
oh maybe I'll build my house in your cloud
here I'm tumbling for you
stumbling through the work that I have to dodon't mean to harm you
by leaving your town again love
but I'm over the ground that you've been spinning but I'm up in the air, said baby hell yeah
oh honey I can see your house from here
if the plane goes down, damn
i'll remember where the love was found
if the plane goes down, damn i'll remember where the love was found
if the plane goes down, damn
well I'll remember where the love was found
if the plane goes down, damn
who do youthink you are, are, are, are
to keep me so oh cold, cold
you keep me high minded
you keep me high mindedyou get me high mindedyou get me high





life really is a bed of roses. on the outside it looks like the most beautiful thing. but the moment you lie on it. the thorns prick you all over and you start bleeding.
deceptive.sad.and beautiful.